The Shadow of Me

Inside me,

Tugging at my heart

Is a shadow

The shadow of my strong bold façade

Darkness surrounding me

In a form

So as to protect me

From them

From the pain and deception

And from myself

Behind these walls of concrete stone

My heart is terrified

Of losing

Losing my loves

And parts of my foundation

In the wake of the night

My soul cries

In an instant

A blink of my eyes

Everything changes

Reality morphs into

Empty nothingness

And I start to feel

Excruciating pain

From the continuous stabs

I leave behind wet footprints

Marked by blood and tears

Still I stagger on

The knot in my throat tightens

But the shade of strength holds me tighter

Silent tears roll down

My expressionless face

My body trembles

There is no use in searching

I already know no one’s coming

No hand to walk me home

And no shoulder to lean on

All that I have to protect me

Is the shadow –

The birth of which

So long ago

Threads from my innocence

It has been there all along

And is the only one I trust

No one else

No soul, no friend, no family

Alone in my fight

My shadow and me

We survive

- Apphia K

© 6th October 2003